Numb
by Ringo-Shiina-Phantom
Summary: Draco realizes what he must do...


**Disclaimer:** Ok, Harry Potter and co. belong to JK Rowling, and are therefore, not mine (snaps). Also, the title comes from Linkin Park's new cd "Meteora" and no, it is not supposed to go with the story, I just liked it.  
  
The sky outside was grey; snow fell from it slowly, creating a winter dreamscape for everyone to enjoy. However, only one person really studied the sight, his icy blue eyes never leaving a certain landmark. Brushing a strand of silvery hair out of his face, Draco sighed, his breath fogging the glass slightly. Frowning, he wiped it away, not wishing to miss one inch of movement from his unknowing subject.  
  
Watching the raven-haired boy, Draco could feel his heart sink into his stomach. He knew no one could ever know of his feelings for the boy, for not only was it socially considered wrong and disgusting for him to like one of his same gender, he also happened to be Draco's rival.  
  
Harry Potter. Yes, that was whom Draco loved, and he had long since quit trying to deny it to himself. What choice did he have? He knew it was love, knew it because of the way his heart skipped a beat every time he saw those beautiful emerald green eyes or heard that silken voice. Knew it because every night when he closed his eyes, his mind always drifted to a distant place where he and Harry could be together, happy and safe from everyone who would shun them.  
  
He knew it was love and for that, he hated it. Hated it because he knew he and Harry could never be together, knew Harry would never feel the same for him. Why should he? After all, Draco helped to make all of his years at Hogwarts a living nightmare. The endless taunting, the never-ending mockeries that Draco never seemed to run out of, all of those greeted Harry every year. It was like a tradition, really.  
  
Resting his head against the glass, he closed his eyes. Yes, he had long since accepted the fact that Harry would never love him back. However, try as he might, he could not stop his thoughts from returning to the green-eyed beauty. He would lie in his bed at night and could replay that very voice in his head, repeatedly, speaking gentle words. However, they were never for him, would never be for him. He knew that and hated it. Hated himself for his love, hated Harry for not loving him back, and hated everyone who were happy in the arms of their lovers.  
  
Opening his eyes, Draco glared down at Harry, angry that the boy was able to smile and laugh with his friends while Draco was forced to sit up here, his heart twisting in pain. All coherent thoughts in Draco's head told him to get over it, to go out there and return to normal, to ignore the boy and get on with his life. The other part of his mind, however, argued differently.  
  
Sighing angrily, Draco stood and walked away from the window. He knew what he had to do, knew it was the only way to rid himself of these horrible thoughts and this pain. Smirking softly, he walked past a young couple, too involved in each other to notice him. He growled and stormed on, his icy eyes never once leaving the doors that would lead to the grounds. He would do this. He would get it over with and please both himself and everyone else. For once, Draco was going to make his father and Harry happy at the same time.  
  
Reaching the doors, he opens one and slips out, ignoring the bite of the frigid air. He paid no attention to the fact that he was not dressed for the snow, took no notice of other's stares as he walked past them all his eyes set intently on the source of all his pain. He saw Ron stop in sentence and look at him, motioning for Hermione and Harry to look as well. Draco's heart beat wildly as those emerald eyes locked with his and then sunk when they clouded with anger. He watched them stand, all awaiting his verbal combat.  
  
He stopped in front of Harry, his breath coming out heavily, creating little white puffs in the air. "What do you want Malfoy?" Draco could feel his body warm at the sound of that voice but quickly shook his head, forcing the cold back into it. Stepping up to Harry, he saw the boy tense but he did not move, refusing to show fear in front of his friends. Draco stared down at him for a long moment before leaning over and letting his lips capture Harry's, a feeling of pride swept through him when he heard Harry's gasp of surprise.  
  
Ron swore silently and Hermione gasped her hands flying to her mouth. Draco blocked them all out, his attention on the warm lips that pressed against his. Pulling away, he looked down at Harry, who stared up at him with a look of complete shock. "I love you Potter, I have ever since our second year. It has just taken me three years to realize it. I do not care if you love me back anymore; it will not matter soon anyway. I just thought I would tell you, figured it was the polite thing to do." He turned this, his legs moving despite his mind screaming for him to stay rooted.  
  
Draco never heard Harry call his name as he walked back toward the castle, never heard the sound of feet running after him as he went to the Owlry and locked the door. Nor did he hear the pounding on the door as he walked to the window and looked down, his eyes scanning to make sure the fall would be his last. It was not until he walked out that he heard Harry's voice carrying to him, over the wind that wiped past his ears.  
  
"I love you too Draco!"  
  
Author note: I do not know what made me write that...wait, yes I do! It was Linkin Park! Damn them...anyway, I know this probably sucked, but if you wish to review you can and I would very much appreciate it. Thanks! Ja ne! 


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